Business Luke steps away from luke, whilst mainting his urine stream and while a puddle of urine expands below Luke's shoes.
"Luke, kiddo. Don't busy yourself with philosophical questions like that. I'm here to save us time. Me and you. How would you like hooky?"
"uuuhhh.. I'm not really into hickies." Lukewarm averts his eyes from making contact.
Luke's nervousness increases over the homoerotic tension "Hay uuh don't you think you should be 'avin a conversation like this in the men's bathroom with some other pony? I just wanted to take a wiz. I mean where's Pinkie Pie in the picture"
ahem>How would you like to play hooky
A flush sounds from behind the urinal duo and a stall door swings wide open. It's another Alt Luke, spinning a roll of paper for shit tickets.
"Haah, She gave 'em the stiff arm."
"It was mutual." Business Luke remain composed in saying
"Tall dark and handsome over here lays her once before proposing. Pinkie tell's em she's married to her work. Salt stocks plummet as B Luke cries me a river."
Luke single takes back to N Luke
"Being mutually exclusive I explained to her I desired a scandalous affair with her work to get away from the routine of my work." B Luke is still composed
Luke takes back to B Luke
"What a coincidence."
And back to N Luke>>739129
"He was creepin'er out. Smokey Luke roasted B Luke like a pig in july."
"He was blowing smoke in my face and acting very unprofessional. He's been demoted to babysitter now."
"B Luke's a bitch." he smirks
"Would you quit." B Luke states firmly. He looks tired of this bullcrap.
"Luke! Wouldn't you wanna go home and jerk off?? Sure you do kid. We all do! See we got a whole room hidden away in the palace here. It's full of video games, and the Duke Lukem Race Against Time complete boxset. Beanbag chairs, tons of codeine and painkillers we stole."
The peeing stops. And Lukewarm zips up his trousers.
"You did all that for me?" He smiles softly feeling undeserved.
"Noo! We did it for ourselves. All you gotta do is sit in that room while We-" Business Luke gestures to himself and Normal Luke "Impersonate being retarded for a day. How's that sound?? It's a great deal!? Don't you wanna fuck off for 12 hours, put this bullshit adventure on pause for a bit so we can be over with it faster huh?? huh??" Business Luke is coming off a little crazed and even drained. Lukewarm didn't noticed before, but Business Luke has some serious bags underneath his eyes. He's probably been doing a lot of crying.
Normal Luke nods completely in agreement.
"hmmm I don't know guys.. I think Nero really wanted to show me off to his folks."
"We'll make a good impression." B Luke continues to insist, almost pleading at this point. "We're not drunk 24/7 right! So you can count on us not hitting on Nero's mom."
"Okay, alright, slow down there Casanova. We don't wanna make it too unrealistic."
"You can hold onto your cat!" B Luke is now pleading "We don't even need her anyways. We got a bag full of cats for us to use just in case." This now almost sounds like whining.
Jean pops her sleepy head out of Luke's drawstring bag. "It sounds like a pretty good deal." She whispers in his ear.
"Aaalright, you guys sold me." Luke says all chummy about it.
He presses a piece of paper into Luke's chest for him to accept "Here's a map to the room."
B Luke then spreads his limbs out in pose. "Normal Luke. Gauze me."
To which Normal Luke responds by hopping off the toilet and wrapping Business Luke in toilet paper.
"Thank Nero crystal ponies literally wipe their ass with gauze."
And thats how a drunk, two retards, a cat and 3 assholes made a pact together. Promising to properly sedate Lukewarm with videogames and drugs while they impersonate him for a day.
FOR WHAT REASON, WHO KNOWS??? TUNE IN NEXT TIME WHEN VERBADOO ISN'T LATE TO THE SLOWEST GAME IN EQUESTRIA!
Thanks I hate it